After I graduated high school I became more aware of the world around me beginning a journey of finding my identity and looking for words I was experiencing throughout my life. During my research about my ancestors and black history, I came across W.E.B Debois, a civil rights activist, writer, and sociologist. I grew up a black girl in a predominantly white neighborhood that much like America idealized eurocentric beauty standards. I did my best growing up to try to fit in by doing things like straightening my hair and remaining passive. It never seems to be enough because no matter who I thought I was, the stereotypes of a black woman always overpowered what people thought of me.
When I took a Black Women in America course my professor asked the class when we step out into the world what identity do we notice about ourselves. I think it depends where I am. If I'm in a place with mostly white people I notice my race, but if I'm somewhere with more men I'm more aware of my womanhood. Most of the time I can't differentiate the two which is why I did my painting that way. I covered the woman's eyes with hands because it defines the term double consciousness, its like never truly seeing yourself. But I also wanted to incorporate that I am a woman and that means living in a world where men try to control what you say, what you wear, your body by putting hands on her mouth, her neck, her shoulders, her arms. But despite the patriarchy trying to control those who are oppressed, our identity peeks through and so do our voices, which is why I gave the woman a huge afro and added all the faces of women around her.
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