In The Midst Of It All..

   

 My 'Self Portrait' is called 'In the midst of it all' because it displays my growth in the midst of the current chaos happening in the world. The flower represents me and everything outside, is the world.

    

For my self portrait I decided to portray my personal experience since the day our world seemed to turn upside down. I've seen nothing but growth, blessings, and perseverance. When I first heard of the corona virus, I didn't think it would be that big of a deal. In fact, I brushed it off and ignored it for quite a bit. It, however, prove to be anything but light. As it continued to expand, it made a lasting impact on not only me, but the world. So many questions arose, but I remained calm for one reason, and one reason only, God. I began to pray for our nation and trust God to deliver us. 

It's no lie that this virus has created havoc for many. Our nation continues to mourn for many. I slowly tried to look on the bright side of things and attempt to apply some new habits to my life. I

began to pray more, read more of God's word, and even try to reflect. I drew closer to God, felt my faith grow, and became more insightful. My goal when I started Rutgers University, through God's will, was to graduate debt free. I was unsure how I would be able to pay off my tuition this semester and I knew I didn't want to add extra stress to my mom as she was already paying for my sister to attend school. All I did was pray and trusted God to provide. Due to the virus, my job was in need of workers and asked me to come in. I was able to take on a lot of extra hours, which enabled me to finalize my payments on Friday, April 17. It sounds crazy but God enables certain things to happen so that many other things could happen.

Ta-Nehisi Coates  said in 'Between the world and Me,' "It was like falling in love --the things that get you are so small, the things that keep you up at night are so particular to you that when you to explain, the only reward anyone can give you is a dumb polite nod."

Now this wasn't exactly small, but I feel like my feeling was quite similar. I couldn't help but continuously fall deeper in love with Christ through out everything. Also, I know that many won't understand or agree, so like he said, the most they will do is give me a nod. Additionally, it  led to me having time to do bible study with my cousins in the house. Not only that, but that motivated me to grow my relationship with Christ.

My vision was to show life in the midst of it all, which is why I chose a plant. The flower represents me. I chose the different colors to show life. The petals shown are falling from the flowers to represent me shedding different things that I needed to let go of. The objects are placed on a green mat to represent grass. The brown surrounding the flower is to represent dead things. The circular Styrofoam shows some headlines featured since the Virus invaded our lives. It's also meant to be orbiting the flower. The idea of the journal influenced me because if I wrote in a journal and looked back at it, it would depict my growth.

In the midst of it all, I grew. I'm not saying this to downplay the horrible impact this virus had on many lives. I'm just showing, that good can be produced in the midst of chaos.